


light me up

by aesthefics



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Flashbacks, Light Angst, M/M, Pining, Slow Burn, Time Skips
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2019-09-28
Packaged: 2020-10-04 16:47:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20474312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aesthefics/pseuds/aesthefics
Summary: Hinata reminds Tsukishima of the sun. Bright and fiery, both are burning to touch.





	light me up

**Author's Note:**

> this was formerly titled as "duyog"

_ang buhok mo'y parang gabing numinipis_  
_sa pagdating ng madaling araw_  
_na kumukulay sa alapaap_

Hinata Shouyou is an eye-catcher. With a bright and loud personality, it is a doubt that his presence will go unnoticeable despite his height, or lack thereof. People take another glance or two when he is near, mostly because of his hair. His hair is the shade of a sweet tangerine, vibrant like a newly-ripe one.

For Tsukishima Kei, Hinata's hair reminds him of the sky at dawn. The sunlight spilling on the fluffy, white clouds early in the morning, making them orange. 

Hinata reminds Tsukishima of the sun. Bright and fiery, both are burning to touch.

"Ow, Tsukishima! What are you doing?" whined Hinata.

Tsukishima did not answer, instead he kept of pressing down his hand on Hinata's head, his palm laying flat on top. Tsukishima felt the hair beneath his palm. It was like cotton, soft and warm. He did not want to let go. Tsukishima wanted to touch more, ruffle Hinata's hair and pat his head. 

The thought made Tsukishima suddenly let go of Hinata's head.

"–argh! Finally, Stingyshima's senses has come back!" Hinata said, while trying to fix his mess of a hair, and failing miserably.

Tsukishima's heart squeezed a little while looking at the scene.

His eyes followed the orange head until Hinata got away from him. Then, he just sighed at the thought that crossed his mind earlier.

Tsukishima thought,_ maybe I really just missed watching the sun rise._

So, Tsukishima went out early in the morning. He watched as the sky is painted with blue, blended with oranges and yellows. He definitely missed this.

However, just as he watched the warm sun rise into the sky, he thought of a certain orange head. An image of them watching the sunrise together suddenly popped into Tsukishima's head. 

_Even though it burns, I still want to touch._

* * *

_ang ngiti mo'y parang isang tala_  
_na matagal na ang kinang_

Their match is already on the second set. Both teams' scores are already on their twenties. Everyone seems so tired because the previous set lasted until 29-31, the other team being in favor. Still, no one wants to give up.

Tsukishima looked at the court and saw Hinata. Hinata was panting, holding onto his knees as support. He must be exhausted because it is already the second match for this day and the opponents seemed to have marked him. Although he thinks that Hinata is always full of energy, bouncing around the court and running at full speed, the sight of him reminded Tsukishima that Hinata is still human after all.

The opposing team seems to make Hinata receive the ball. Having improved, he diligently received it. However, the action somehow messed up the formation, just like how the other team wanted. The other team also sends the ball to places where the receives can prevent Hinata from doing his run-up. Tsukishima saw through the other team's tactics and thought that it may be frustrating for Hinata.

Tsukishima rotated into the front again. He watched Hinata as he was running back into the court. Hinata wore a serious expression on his face, a look that appears when he is concentrating. It is a known fact that Hinata always wanted to win– he craves for it. Being unable to do so leads up to Hinata's pent up frustration and determination to break free from the shackles and score.

So when Kageyama called an open toss, Hinata perked up. His eyes gleaming while he jumped, and Tsukishima watched it all happen. For a moment, he forgot that they are in a match and all he sees is Hinata. The gym lights are shining upon him, making him brighter.

Hinata smacked the ball, landing where it is hard for the other team to receive. A loud thud was heard, and there was silence. Loud cheers from the audience suddenly erupted when the scoreboard showed a 26-28, Karasuno winning the second set.

Tsukishima looked at his right and saw Hinata. Just when he thought that Hinata could not get any brighter, he saw his expression. 

Hinata no longer held a serious expression. What replaced his look was a smiling face, his mouth grinning wide that it shows his teeth and scrunches up his cheeks. Hinata was too bright, like a star in the night sky, and it is almost blinding. Tsukishima's eyes lingered on him. As if he is stargazing, he stared at Hinata.

_Tsukishima loved the stars, and he cannot take his eyes away from Hinata because he too, is a star right in front of him. _

_ngunit ngayon lang nakita_  
_kung kailan wala na_

The third and final set started. Tsukishima thought that Hinata must be tired now. Yet, knowing the volleyball idiot that Hinata is, he does not like leaving when a match is still on going.

The score is tied at 15. Karasuno's spirits were lifted after Hinata was able to break free and score against the other team. 

Hinata jumped. Having contact with the floor, the soles of his feet made a loud sound. Seeing the unusual height of his jump, Tsukishima knew that there is something wrong. 

Instead of the sound of a ball smacking onto the ground, the sound of something heavier falling resonated through the gymnasium. Everyone was shocked and fell into silence. The only sound evident was that of the ball still bouncing in Karasuno's side of the court.

Tsukishima and his teammates immediately searched for the source of the sound. What they saw was a cruel sight. Hinata is clutching his right knee, chewing on his lips as if it hurts so much.

It did. It hurts so much that there are tears pricking in Hinata's eyes. It hurts because they may not let him play until the end of this match. Hinata cannot take it because he always wanted to win. Still, he knows he can do nothing right now.

To prevent further complications, Hinata was immediately rushed to the gym clinic. Tsukishima watched as Yamaguchi subbed in for the orange head.

The audience roared once again. Even though Hinata is out for the rest of the game, Karasuno still won. Seeing one of their teammates hurt gave them a new drive to win, and to make Hinata happy. 

Everyone is rejoicing, but Tsukishima is not as happy as everyone is. He thinks about Hinata, who will be showing that blinding smile of his while hugging his teammates if he was there.

Tsukishima realized that he wanted to win. He wanted his team to win, but he wanted to win _with him._

Because for Tsukishima, _the night sky is the prettiest if the moon and the stars shine together._

* * *

_kailan kaya mahahalata  
ang pighati sa ilalim ng iyong mga tawa_

The members went to the clinic after the match to let Hinata know the good news. They saw him lying on the bed, an arm over his forehead as he stared blankly at the ceiling.

"Shouyou! We won the game!" Nishinoya exclaimed happily. Hinata smiled, but it was lacking it's usual lustre.

"Yeah, and I wasn't able to participate in the rest of the game," Hinata said, his upturned lips falling. "I even wasted points during the second set," he continued.

"Dumbass, of course you won't be able to participate in the match because you strained your muscles. You need to know that taking a break is a must too." Kageyama said grumpily.

"Yeah, and we will still be able to play on matches tomorrow. So if you want to play, you need to rest." Daichi added.

"So, sleep well tonight okay. No more practices, we know you practiced hard for this tournament already." said Suga. 

"Okay!" Shouyou said while smiling.

Tsukishima felt that his heart was stabbed when he saw that Hinata's smile did not reach his eyes.

* * *

_ang buhay mo'y parang kandila na pumapawi_  
_sa kadiliman ng gabing puno ng dalita_  
_at ng lagim_

Tsukishima is aleady on his third year of high school. Barely a year left, and soon he will be parting with some of his teammates.

The Karasuno Volleyball Club picked Yamaguchi as their captain, and Tsukishima as the vice captain. Tsukishima thought that Kageyama should be the one in his position right now, but he did not intend to argue on it anymore.

The said team is at the Tokyo Training Camp, preparing for the upcoming Summer Interhigh Tournament. For the past years, Karasuno should have improved by now and winning most of the matches since they won the Nationals. However, that is not what the scoreboards are showing right now.

It is becoming frustrating, Tsukishima keeps on telling the juniors on what they should improve and the strategies they must make in order for them to win the matches. Yet, none of these seems to go in their favor. Don't get him wrong, the juniors are great with their exceptional talents, but Tsukishima does not get what is wrong with the team's rhythm right now.

And so he started to think that maybe he is the problem.

After dinner, Tsukishima went to the third gym where he used to practice with Bokuto, Kuroo and Akaashi. He contemplated if he made a mistake of not inviting Lev and Hinata, the only ones left in the so called "original third gym squad."

Tsukishima is fiddling the ball, thinking of what to do while he is there. Then, he heard a pair of shoes squeaking, and it turned out that he did not need to invite Hinata anymore.

"Hey Tsukki," Hinata called. It surprised Tsukishima that Hinata called him in a soft voice, making him unable to reply. Hinata did not seem to mind the lack of response, so he continued. "Thanks for your hard work today." 

Hinata stood next to Tsukishima, both of their backs leaning on the wall. Tsukishima saw in the corner of his eye that Hinata looked at him, his head tilted so that he can see his face. 

"I know I don't know what exactly you are feeling right now, but I know that it's hard," Hinata said, still not moving his gaze from Tsukishima. "I know volleyball can be frustrating and that the juniors can be a handful, but I know you can deal with it just fine." he continued, now smiling at Tsukishima.

When that smile appeared, Tsukishima cannot help it but to return his gaze. "How can you say so?" Tsukishima asked. "It's because you are you Tsukki. You are amazing, you're smart and you're tall! A great middle blocker and a very good vice captain!" Hinata said, not even showing a slightest hint of embarassment as he showered Tsukishima with compliments.

Tsukishima thought that it's funny how things have changed after two years. Because if this happened on their first year, Hinata would not even be here right now.

"I am not even in a bad mood," defended Tsukishima. "Uh-huh, well you can't fool me because your eyebrows literally formed only a line during the matches we played today." Hinata argued. 

"Besides, I think I can tell some of your moods apart from each other now. Isn't that an improvement!" Hinata giggled, and the sounds ring into Tsukishima's ear making his heart beat faster.

Tsukishima was at loss for words, so he kept quiet. "You know you can talk to me when you're feeling like this. After all, we are already friends right?" Hinata insisted. Tsukishima just stared at him. "Come on! Tsukki we're friends now right? It's literally more than two years already!" Hinata is now whining.

"Well, I guess," said Tsukishima, because the scene is already getting too much for his heart to handle. "Hmph, I consider you as a friend anyway, so you don't have a choice." Hinata said while pouting.

Right then and there, with just Hinata's presence, Tsukishima thought that maybe this day was not that bad at all.

_Maybe each day could be better if he has Hinata by his side._

* * *

_bawat segundo ay natutunaw_  
_tumutulo parang luha_  
_ humuhugis na parang mga puting paru-paro_

"Thanks for your hard work today! See you again tomorrow," Yamaguchi, the team captain, said as he sends off his juniors as they finished cleaning. Only the third years are left, still standing in front of the gym.

They started walking towards the bicycle racks. It has become a routine for them as they started their last year in Karasuno. The third years seem to always spend their time together now as graduation is only months away.

Hinata stepped forward, right in front of the other third years, then he halted. "Hey! Let's go to the store today, I really want pork buns." said Hinata while facing them with a grin.

"But you always want pork buns! Plus, we always go the store, no need to tell us dumbass," Kageyama replied. Hinata was about to start bickering with him but Yamaguchi chimed in saying, "Yeah sure! Also, come along with us Yacchan." This time he turned to face Yachi.

Yachi flinched slightly as she was called out while watching them. "Of course!" she replied as she catches up to them.

The five of them headed to the store, the rest of the trip silent. Yachi was beside Yamaguchi, who is walking beside Tsukishima. Next to Tsukishima was Hinata, then Kageyama.

They went to buy snacks of their own. After buying, they decided to eat in front of the store.

"Ah! Graduation is fast approaching don't you think?" Yachi said all of a sudden. She was fiddling with the spoon of her sundae.

"Yeah! Do you already have universities that you want to go to?" Hinata answered. "I want to go to that prestigious university in Tokyo which is also known for how great their volleyball team is!" he added, before going back to eating pork buns again.

"I want to go there too." said Kageyama. "Well, I guess we'll be teammates again huh?" Hinata immediately replied. "Only if we both get accepted though," Kageyama said nonchalantly.

"That's mean, Bakageyama! Of course we'll go there together. We still need to know who stays longer in the court, remember?" Hinata then turned towards his other friends. "How about you guys? Where will you study?"

"I am not sure. I think I want to continue volleyball even at uni, but I don't want to leave Miyagi. Maybe the university with the greatest volleyball team in the prefecture?" Yamaguchi answered.

Yachi was the next to answer, "Well, I want to take an Arts & Design course, so maybe I'll just stay here in Miyagi since we have some good school here."

"How about you, Tsukki? You have been quiet since practice. Is there something wrong?" Hinata asked. Tsukishima then answered, "Nothing," completely ignoring Hinata's original question.

However, Hinata is not one to give up, so he tried to ask again. This time, Tsukishima finally answered as if to make Hinata stop. "I am staying here in Miyagi," is all that he said.

"Aw, it's sad that we have to part ways after high school." Hinata said as a sad tone leaked in his voice. His face when he said that is another thing.

"Yeah, I'll definitely miss this. I suddenly remember back when we were first years, Tsukishima-kun won't even be bothered to go with us. I guess it really has been a long time now, huh?" Yachi added, smiling but her sentence wavered at the end.

"'Dumbass, don't get sad too soon. We still have time left. It's not like we're not gonna see each other forever." Kageyama said, trying to break the sadness that washed over the group. Yamaguchi supported his statement and said, "He's right! Plus, we still have time to spend together. Let's use it well." 

And so all of them agreed to that. They will eat lunch together, go to the store after every practice, study together, and everything they can do to not waste any of their time while they are still together. Looking back, they were amazed at how they all ended up like this.

Now, they are all walking home together. They stopped as they now need to go separate ways. The third years bid each other goodbye, just as if they are already practicing for what the future holds. Hinata did not answer though.

With the setting sun at his back, Hinata said, "'`Til we meet again!" The words hold a promise of seeing each other again. Hinata soon rode his back after he said those words, leaving just the four of them.

Right then and there, each one of them realized that they never want to say goodbye. So instead, just like what Hinata did, they said "`Til we meet again." instead of their usual farewells.

At the sanctuary of his room, Tsukishima laid in his bed as everything that happened within his three years in Karasuno replayed in his mind. He had an epiphany that time flies fast, just like the butterflies they saw when they were eating lunch by the school grounds.

Tsukishima does not want that. He wants to hold onto what they have right now, and he wants it to last longer than it is supposed to be.

* * *

_kailan kaya mahahalata_  
_ang pighati sa ilalim ng iyong mga tawa_

The last Spring High Tournament just ended. Karasuno is officially a powerhouse again as they won the nationals. The third years are expecting some scouts by now.

It was no surprise that Kageyama will be the first one scouted as he was known for being a genius setter since he was in middle school. He might have rejected an offer or two already, but this one is different.

The offer was from his and Hinata's dream school. Tsukishima watched as Kageyama conversed with the scout and gladly accept the scholarship. Tsukishima also watched how Hinata's shoulders slumped forward, a downcast look etched on his face.

Hinata's skills have improved so much, and Tsukishima actualky acknowledges it. The ace was no longer a black hole in receiving, and his blocks always leave the audience with shock and amusement evident in their expressions. He also racks up scores just like what he did during the first year, but this time, he is actually stronger.

So Tsukishima gets it, he understands the blue expression of Hinata as the scout walks away after talking to Kageyama. What Tsukishima do not get is why Hinata was not offered a scholarship just like Kageyama.

"Hinata," Kageyama calls out, already on his way to wash away the gloom in his best friend. "I recommended you to him. They said they'll look into it. The university seems to be pretty stuck up on height requirements. I'm sure you'll get in though, we've already won nationals and all."

"I know that! It'd be their loss if they don't offer me a scholarship!" Hinata said jokingly, as if he did not have a sullen look in his face a while ago.

Hinata once again wore a smile in his face, one that can rival the stars, but Tsukishima knows better. It seemed as the starlight has faltered.

_kahit mawala ka pa_  
_hinding-hindi mawawala_  
_ang damdamin ko'y sa'yong-sa'yo_

Hinata did not get the offer from his dream school.

This time, he looked crestfallen, and it makes Tsukishima's heart hurt.

He and the other third years tried to cheer him up. "You can always apply for a scholarship, you know." Tsukishima said, patting Hinata's head once.

"Tsukki's right! There is always a chance Hinata." Yamaguchi added, he also just wanted remove the frown in Hinata's face.

"They have a point. And you already kinda got my hopes up that we will be on the same team again, so you better get in the uni with me." Kageyama was also consoling his best friend.

"Well, I guess I can do that. It's just nice if they also scouted me." Hinata's frown deepens. Yachi put her finger between Hinata's eyebrows and said, "Cheer up, Hinata-kun! I am sure you'll get in there. We believe in you!"

The other three nodded, showing Hinata that they support him in achieving his dreams. With that, Hinata smiled and thanked them for being there for him.

One day, five weeks before graduation when Yachi asked Hinata. "Hinata-kun, did you get that scholarship yet?" 

"Ah, the results are not yet out, so I don't know yet. I hope I did though!" he answered.

Two weeks left and Tsukishima will be bidding his friends goodbye.

Kageyama turned to Hinata, "What school will you attend?"

Hinata shoved his food in his mouth. He chewed slowly as if he did not want to answer. 

They waited for him to speak, but the question left unanswered. They thought that maybe Hinata wants it to be a surprise so they just let him off the hook.

Tsukishima wanted to know though. He sometimes think that maybe he can try and apply for a scholarship wherever Hinata will go. However, the thought just stays at the back of his mind, sometimes tugging at his heart.

* * *

_ni isang beses ay hindi pa 'ko_  
_nakakakain ng paru-paro_  
_ngunit tila bakit ang sikmura ko'y puno?_

Tsukishima is already at his second year in university now. 

He stayed and studied in Miyagi, just like what he said when he and his friends had a talk that one time. He even goes to the same university as Yamaguchi.

"Ugh, I'm sick of seeing your face almost everyday for years already!" Yamaguchi once said jokingly. Tsukishima did not take the words to heart as he know that Yamaguchi's words are not serious.

He and Yamaguchi still meet up with Yachi regularly as they all study in Miyagi. Kageyama also had video calls with them when he is not busy with practice. For Hinata though, he just stopped talking to them.

The first time the four of them communicated with each other after their graduation, it was because of a message Kageyama sent.

He said that Hinata was not enrolled in the university he's at. He only knew about it after a week of looking for him at the campus.

All of them were sad to hear about the news. After all, they wanted to keep their friendship and they want it to remain strong.

Tsukishima went out to buy coffee as his roommate in the name of Yamaguchi, ordered him to go out since their professors gave them a task because they did not have class today. 

"Come on Tsukki, I was the one who bought the sweets last time!" is what Yamaguchi said, so Tsukishima complied.

Just as he was about to enter the coffeeshop, Tsukishima saw an orange blob.

He was stunned, his feet rooted to the ground. Tsukishima waited as the person exit the shop.

Tsukishima had a sharp intake of breath as the sound from the chimes resonated. He was now standing in front of a small man with orange hair.

The said orange head seemed shocked that someone blocked his way. He looked up, then his eyes went wide.

Tsukishima wanted to speak, but he was tongue-tied so he's really just staring at him.

The orange head regained his composure, then he smiled at Tsukishima. This smile is brighter than the others, almost blinding Tsukishima. He realized that he missed seeing that person smile.

_"Kei,"_ Hinata called out, still beaming, and Tsukishima felt the butterflies in his stomach go wild.

* * *

_saka ko naalala na noon_  
_nang una kong masabi ang pangalan mo_  
_nakalunok ako kaya siguro_

The graduation ceremony has ended. Now, there is only a little time left before everyone will say goodbye after taking tons of pictures for memories.

Tsukishima somehow lamented the fact that he and Hinata, and also his other friends, are from different classes. This unfortunately did not let them be together just slightly longer.

Holding on to a button, Tsukishima searched for Hinata. He is determined to do this because he does not know if he will he able to do it other than this moment.

When he spotted Hinata, he strided towards him hurriedly. _"Shouyou!" _

Hinata was confused at the unusual usage of his first name. Tsukishima grabbed Hinata's hands and shoved the button into it. He then left swiftly, the pace the same as when he had come to Hinata.

* * *

_kailan kaya mahahalata_  
_ang pighati sa ilalim ng iyong mga tawa_

Hinata is still smiling at him. Then his eyes watered, and he jumped right into Tsukishima's arms and put his head in his shoulder. "I missed you." Hinata cried. Tsukishima cannot hold it anymore and he also wrapped his arms tightly around Hinata

"I missed you," Hinata said once again, loosening his embrace, but not leaving.

Tsukishima was speechless for a while, still absorbing everything that is happening right now. He then answered, "I missed you too. So. Much."

Hinata looked up at him and stared at his eyes, wanting to savour the moment.

_kahit mawala ka pa_  
_hinding-hindi mawawala_  
_ang damdamin ko'y sa'yong-sa'yo_

"Please don't leave without talking to me this time." Tsukishima pleaded. He is tired of being subtle anymore.

Hinata answered which made Tsukishima happy, "I won't."

They smiled at each other. Then the scene is interrupted once Hinata spoke again. "Y'know, I've been meaning the ask you this for a long time now." Hinata said quietly. 

Tsukishima just looks at him with curiosity. "The button. Which was it?" Hinata then asked. Realization seemed to dawn on Tsukishima, but he also answered immediately.

"The second." Tsukishima said. Hinata looks like he is pleased. "Well, may I kiss you?" Tsukishima suddenly got courageous. "Not if I kiss you first," said Hinata as he closed the distance between their lips.

The taste of their first kiss was sweet just like what both of them had expected. And the feeling, it was not like the wild collywobbles earlier. Instead, everything seemed as if the world is in slow motion.

_sa'yong-sa'yo_

"I want to stay by your side now, and maybe until forever? I want to compromise for the time I have wasted," Hinata said after the kiss.

"I love you, so much." Tsukishima said suddenly.

Hinata let out a chuckle that sounds so beautiful to Tsukishima's ear. "I love you too, so much."

Yamaguchi does not say anything when Tsukishima brought back a certain orange head instead of coffee.

**Author's Note:**

> italicized lowercase lines are lyrics from "sa'yo" by munimuni! they 're great, pls check them out and the song used here
> 
> in japan, u give someone ur second button if you like them during graduation, thus that one scene !!
> 
> hello! thank you so much for reading my first ever fic in this fandom! ahjfbfb i apologize for mistakes because i only got back to writing this year. AAAAAA i hope you somehow enjoyed my work. ヾ(≧▽≦*)o
> 
> i just wanna share that this actually lasted a month in drafts because i always forget to continue but finally, it's here! anyway, the song really just scream tsukkihina to me so,, (*´∇｀*)
> 
> if you like this work pls leave kudos and let me know in the comments! (pls also comment the things u did not like or smth so i will also be aware of them!) 
> 
> i am a multi-shipper for hinata so if u wanna talk abt it pls approach me on my main @KROWSUNO or my writing acc @aesthefics on twitter.
> 
> once again, thank you for reading AAAAA ♡♡


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